![\"planet-mercury1\"](\"http:\/\/www.navamsa.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/07\/planet-mercury1-150x150.gif\" "\\"planet-mercury1\\"")
The scene opens on the downtown office of famous psychotherapist Dr. Chiron. The doctor, in his sixties and sporting the obligatory goatee of his profession, sits behind a desk that bears a statue of Atlas carrying the world on his shoulders. On the walls are pictures of Sigmund Freud, Dane Rudhyar, Carl Jung and Liz Greene. Interspersed among them are pictures of clients, or rejects from a Diane Arbus exhibit, we don\u00e2\u0080\u0099t know which.<\/p>\n
Enter Mercury, a twitchy metrosexual with a cup of takeout coffee in one hand and a copy of Wired<\/em> in the other. He sinks into the deep leather chair opposite Dr. Chiron\u00e2\u0080\u0099s desk and releases a heavy world-weary sigh, not unlike that of a moose who\u00e2\u0080\u0099s finally been run to ground by wolves.<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: And how are we doing this week?<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m at the end of my rope.<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: What seems to be the problem?<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: It\u00e2\u0080\u0099s d\u00c3\u00a9j\u00c3\u00a0 vu<\/em>, all over again.<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: Don\u00e2\u0080\u0099t quote Yogi Berra, speak from your own heart.<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m tired of being blamed for everything.<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: I feel your pain. Share with me.<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: It\u00e2\u0080\u0099s like a recurring nightmare. Every time I go retrograde, people lay every misfortune at my doorstep. I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m afraid to step outside. There\u00e2\u0080\u0099s so much vilification piled on my lawn that the City\u00e2\u0080\u0099s assigned a special garbage truck just to haul away all the crap that people are dumping on me.<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: Metaphorically speaking, of course\u00e2\u0080\u00a6<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: No. I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m literal as hell, and I can\u00e2\u0080\u0099t take it any more. If the computer crashes, I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m the virus. If the flight\u00e2\u0080\u0099s cancelled, I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m the technical difficulty. If there\u00e2\u0080\u0099s a labor strike, I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m the instigator. If the stock market falls, I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m the bad news bear. I can\u00e2\u0080\u0099t even take the subway to work any more. You should see the looks I get when the train\u00e2\u0080\u0099s late. I can hear them muttering under their breath as they give me dirty looks across the platform. He\u00e2\u0080\u0099s at it again, the little weasel.<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: Look, you\u00e2\u0080\u0099re not alone. Friday the 13th has a public relations problem too.<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: Don\u00e2\u0080\u0099t patronize me. Friday\u00e2\u0080\u0099s got it made in the shade compared to me. People love Friday. \u00e2\u0080\u009cTGIF,\u00e2\u0080\u009d they say, like a prayer that\u00e2\u0080\u0099s been answered. You know what Friday\u00e2\u0080\u0099s associated with? Dinner, drinks, dancing and the dirty deed. But do you ever hear anyone say, thank God it\u00e2\u0080\u0099s Mercury retrograde?<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: Not in my 30 years of practice.<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: (nudging the Kleenex in Mercury\u00e2\u0080\u0099s direction) Don\u00e2\u0080\u0099t take it so personally.<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: Can you blame me? Look, the facts are pretty obvious. I only go retrograde three times a year, for about twenty days at a shot. That\u00e2\u0080\u0099s sixty days out of the year. And yet, when I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m retrograde, it\u00e2\u0080\u0099s like every Tom, Dickie and Harriet goes on red alert, looking for a disaster to blame on me. Come on, people, get a life. Was I retrograde when the twin towers went down? No. When the Indonesian tsunami rolled in? No. When Katrina drowned New Orleans? No.<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: I guess most people overlooked that.<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: Lucky for me, else I would have been burned at the stake. But my reputation\u00e2\u0080\u0099s ruined anyway. You know how hard it is for me to get a date, to hold a job? As soon as something goes wrong, it\u00e2\u0080\u0099s my fault. Just because I occasionally go retrograde doesn\u00e2\u0080\u0099t mean I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m a pervert or a saboteur. Except for the luminaries, all of the other planets do it, but does anyone ever blame anything on them?<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: Unfortunately, you seem to have been type-cast.<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: Well, I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m tired of being everyone\u00e2\u0080\u0099s astrological whipping boy. Let\u00e2\u0080\u0099s share the blame. Consider the astronomical data. In any given year, both Venus and Mars are retrograde for more than a month or two, respectively. Jupiter and Saturn are walking backward for four months. And those outer planets, they\u00e2\u0080\u0099re all in reverse for five months at a stretch! And nobody points a finger at any of them! But let me turn my back for just three weeks, and suddenly it\u00e2\u0080\u0099s open season for Mercury-bashing.<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: (looking at his watch) I\u00e2\u0080\u0099m sorry, but our time is up. Shall we schedule a few follow-up sessions?<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: Sure. (turning on his BlackBerry) Same time next Wednesday?<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: Sorry, we\u00e2\u0080\u0099ll have to skip the next three weeks.<\/p>\n Dr. Chiron<\/em>: No. You\u00e2\u0080\u0099ll be retrograde.<\/p>\n Mercury<\/em>: AAAAAARRRRGGGHHH!!!<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n ———————————————————————————————-<\/p>\n Do you like mystery\/thriller fiction? Here’s what \u00e2\u0080\u008eSteven Forrest, author of\u00c2\u00a0The Inner Sky<\/em>,\u00c2\u00a0Stalking Anubis<\/em>, and other books, has to say about my astrological mystery novel:<\/p>\n “Alan Annand is a terrific mystery writer. Scorpio Rising<\/em> sweeps you along in a crossfire of interlocking plot-avalanches, with vivid characters, a luminous sense of place, and no shortage of carnage. But to me, Annand\u00e2\u0080\u0099s greatest strength is the way he weaves a convincing working knowledge of a metaphysician\u00e2\u0080\u0099s world view into each page. Astrologers, palmists, and readers of life\u00e2\u0080\u0099s patterns of synchronicities and omens will sense, not only a kindred spirit at work here, but a genuine teacher.”<\/p>\n ———————————————————————————————-<\/p>\n![\"freddie-mercury\"](\"http:\/\/www.navamsa.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/07\/freddie-mercury.jpg\" "\\"freddie-mercury\\"")
Mercury<\/em>: And why not, I ask you? Mercury retrograde is good for lots of stuff. One-sixth of humanity is born with Mercury retrograde. Does that make us all villains? Many of us are academics, artists, business people, designers, geniuses, models, writers, scientists. Why does the world hate us just because it looks like we\u00e2\u0080\u0099re going against the tide? (sniffles)<\/p>\n![\"screaming-man2\"](\"http:\/\/www.navamsa.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/07\/screaming-man2-150x150.jpg\" "\\"screaming-man2\\"")
Mercury<\/em>: Why? You\u00e2\u0080\u0099re on vacation?<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.navamsa.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/07\/Scorpio-Risingv-ebook-june221.jpg\" "\\"Scorpio")
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